Paradise

"Unbelievable" is the only word that some of the Amish family members could say as we stood around the bedside of one of the girls who was shot execution style in Lancaster Co., PA. In the midst of the horror that cannot be quantified, so much confusion characterized the hours and minutes following the siege. Children lay dying from their wounds in various hospitals, as parents were driven hospital to hospital in hopes of finding their children...hoping to find them alive. For the family that I sat with, this was not the outcome. As their child lay dying, they were told that another child in another city was also dying, and that she could be theirs as well. More family arrived in one city, as others were rushed to the second city. All of this so different from the usual day-to-day of the Old Order Amish of Lancaster Co. As I learned of the story, I did not think that it would directly affect me, until one family was placed in my care. As we shared our faith in the ultimate power of God, we found more similarities than differences. I wondered how they felt though, as they walked into the hospital. So many others watched them take the long walk through the hospital and to the ICU, the clothing being the evidence that this family was affected, that this family had a child dying behind the double doors. I also wondered about other chaplains in the other hospitals. I happened to be on-call last night, so I was somehow there in the midst of one family's pain. It was a long, long night, as more tests were done to confirm what we feared. Yet after a while it seemed that this ultimate ending was not to be feared, but to be accepted. I thought of Christ on the cross as he said "Today you will be with me in paradise". So strange, the places we find ourselves; so far away, the places we long to be. I have no words about the man who did this, or the meaning that we could attach to this event. There are no words. Last night I was invited into the sacred circle of those who perhaps normally would not invite a person like myself in. I was told that Amish communities face the dilemma of working vs. spending quality time with children, just like so many other American families. In the darkest hours of the night, all need sleep, all need quiet, all need food and drink, and all need to know that we are loved, and that we are not alone. The young girl who died at my location last night was not alone, and will remain so deeply loved.