Truth on Fatherhood & Snow

Loved, Missed, Never Forgotten

Happy Father's Day

We here at Mod-Blog want to wish the many fathers (and fathers-to-be) who post or comment here a VERY happy Father's Day. May today be a truly special celebration of all the hard work you do and all you sacrifice to make your family's lives better.

(Apologies to others who should be pictures, but aren't. There is only room for so many.)

Call to arms for Fathers

I have been stricken recently by a trend I see more and more in society of expecting less and less of fathers. Commercials have designated the father as the butt of all jokes. Sitcoms show fathers as either bumbling or clueless. Dramas usually show them as abusive or absent. And the phrase you hear most often of fathers in the office is, "Well, at least he isn't a deadbeat dad." Not exactly high praise. Our society has gone from "father knows best" to "father's gone missing." So it is nice to see at least one commentator calling us on this trend.

I remember watching an OnStar commercial. And as the company touted the features, it showed a father driving his child around, and when the kid starts to cry, the dad freaks out and has to quickly call the mom to calm the baby down. I'm watching that and saying, "Man, it's your child, too! So calm it!"

Then there is the commercial -- I don't even remember what they were pitching -- of two or three kids in the kitchen making a mess after spilling the cereal. The hapless and hopeless dad looks at them and says, "Where is your mom?"

Every time that commercial comes on I scream at the TV, "Where is your mom? Where are your parenting skills, you ingrate!"

I am still a single guy, so I don't have a lot to offer on fatherhood. But I respect my friends who are fathers, and who truly give everything to be good dads to their kids. I know this Sunday is Mother's Day, but here is a Mod-Blog salute to good fathers, too!

Failing At Fatherhood

I got the following quote a few days ago. Other than being speechless, I'm really not sure what else to say other than his priorities are obviously messed up. It's sad that someone who should be a role model for others isn't even willing to be a role model for his son. Quote edited to make it more family friendly.

"He's how I was when I was younger-but a little sharper... I wanna be [a good father], but it's hard because of the things that I say and the things that I represent. I can only imagine how his teachers feel. Even though I'm talking to him, I'm still just off the other end of the phone. I tell him every time I talk to him that I'm not ashamed of who I am. My son's seen me locked up, [messed] up. I lay around and think maybe I'm sacrificing the wrong end. Maybe I should have sacrificed this for him. It crosses my mind a lot, but I don't know."

- Rapper Jay "Young Jeezy" Jenkins, Vibe, August 2008, pg. 86.

Obama's Father's Day Speech

In yet another example of how I want to like Obama, he gave a Father's Day message speaking out to men to take more responsibility and be fathers, not just men who have fathered children. I wish his views, especially on abortion, weren't so liberal. It has been said that the problem with the inner city is not poverty, but fatherlessness. If he could bring about a revolution of men taking responsibility and being fathers to their children, that would, in my opinion, do more for our country and our economy than any stimulus plan ever could.

Happy Fathers Day

A very warm "Happy Fathers Day" too all of our readers and posters who are fathers, or who will be shortly. May you be shown the appreciation you deserve, today, and may you have many, many more happy father's days to come.

To own father, "I love you and we'll join you there in Heaven when the time comes, God willing." Of course, I don't know if they have internet access in the afterlife, but you never know.

Do the "Men as Buffoons" ads really sell anything?

I posted a commentary late last year about how sick I am of seeing only ads that portray men as idiots and bad fathers. Inevitably, over and over, advertisers show men as the buffoon of the family, requiring the mother or child to come to his rescue when he partakes in some idiocy of the masculine kind. Every once in a while would not be a problem - we men certainly have our foibles - but it is by far the dominant paradigm in advertising nowadays.

But now, it appears advertisers are finally taking notice. Ad Age has up this article which calls for more positive portrayals of men in advertising.

While the advertising industry's negative depiction of fathers certainly isn't the cause of fatherlessness, it is part of the problem. In a TV culture like ours, the fact that the only fathers one can see on TV are buffoonish (at best) does influence young people's perceptions of fathers.

For young men, it makes it less likely they'll aspire to be fathers, see their own value as fathers or, as Mr. Pitts explains, want to do the "hard but crucial work of being Dad." For young women, it means they'll be more likely to be misled into thinking that their children's fathers aren't important, that divorce or separation from them is no big deal, or that they should, as is the increasing trend, simply dispense with dad altogether and have children on their own.

Here is hoping that this gains some momentum and we see more ads showing men as engaged, competent fathers. It can only help our society remember that fathers are important, and men should strive to be the best men and fathers they can be.

I Like "Dad-logic"